In Memory of A Friend


Just the other day I received some sad news from afar about a friend of mine who just passed away. There was something unique about this older woman who just welcomed me with open arms & wanted to learn from me about the world & myself.  I spotted an unique kindness in her that I have seen in myself on many levels. I meant her through a friend of mine’s eikaiwa class when I was living in Matsue, Japan.  I’ve been having many kind memories flashing back racing threw my mind like the Matrix, an never ending projector reminding me of my time in Japan with overwhelming good memories, since hearing the news. I was touch by her endless acts of kindness & going on many wonderful adventures with her around Shimane, like the day we went down to Iwami Silver Mines cos I wanted to go there, checking out the lighthouse in Mihonoseki & of course adventures in onsens just to name a few.  Well the Sorting Hat, placed me in Matsue to learn some lessons in this Uni-verse full of life force energy.  There’s a fabulous short clip by James Van Praagh, describing energy & how we are a vortex of energy, Engergy 101.  One of my lessons that I received was hanging out with this friend of mine that still touches me deeply since my days many moons ago in Matsue.
According to Wikipedia, Aparigraha is define by:
Aparigraha is the concept of non-possessiveness or non-greediness being both a Jain concept and a part of the Raja Yoga or Ashtanga Yoga traditions. The term usually means to limit possessions to what is necessary or important, which changes with the time period, though sadhus would not have any possessions.
I’ve learned the word through many yoga classes, but didn’t know that there was actually a word for the principle of being kind without self judgment. There’s a great article on Mind Body Green, 35 Ways to Radiate Positive Energy  that reminded me of the importance of kindness. Growing up, my mother kept on teaching me the importance of being “a Good Smaritan” by endless acts of kindness. The lessons have always been there about kindness, but in today’s world with labels upon labels they just get changed into something more hip to make it sound more sexy & glamorous that we tend to actually forget the real meaning & beauty of it.
“I do not understand the mystery of grace -- only that it meets us where we are, but does not leave us where it found us.”
~Anne Lamott
Oh, some suggestions for playing it forward so to speak is, to give without expecting something from your egoic self taking over are:
·      To pay for the person behind you in queue’s coffee at the café.
·      To donate your old close to charity.
·      Randomly give away an item of clothing to your friend cos they said they like it.
·      Donate a print to a charity auction.
·      Leave flowers/plants at someone who you don’t know house/apartment.
·      Smile to everyone who you meet.
·      Send postcards to friends that you haven’t heard from in a while.
·      Reach out to a friend during a crisis.
·      Offer your services to others at no cost.
·      Buy a friend a drink at the bar.
·      Offer to watch your friend’s kids & don’t take money from them.
·      Sharing your music with others by allowing them to take what they want from your iTunes library.
The list is endless with infinite possibilities. There’s no right or wrong way to do it. The Uni-verse will always be providing goodness no matter what you do. Just think of it, as the law of karma, but it’s best to do it without expecting anything in return that’s where you’ll find the real magic.

I’m blessed to have known this friend of mine. I’m sure she’ll be popping threw inspiring from the other side reminding everyone whom she touched on the real beauty of kindness.
“We must find time to stop & thank the people who make a difference in our lives.”
~Dan Zadra


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